Tuesday, December 20, 2011
It is a very little known fact, so little in fact that I am probably the only one in the entire universe that is aware that before Santa considered reindeers to guide his sleigh, he contemplated the moose. Because of their size he thought they would be more proficient at pulling a sleigh full of toys, cars, flat screen televisions and all the other goodies we ask for. Santa called upon the elves that make up his research and development team to undertake a study and determine if the moose would be suitable for the task. After months of testing and many more months analyzing the data, the elves determined that moose were not acceptable for two reasons. First, because they are solitary animals, they do not form herds so being harnessed to a fellow moose would more likely result in fighting than teamwork. Secondly, and probably most importantly, the size, thickness and shape of their antlers does not support the aerodynamics necessary for flight. In the written pronouncement the elves prepared for Santa, they further stated that in their opinion moose are more suitable for spreading Christmas cheer such as Merry Christmoose from Bugaboo, rather than pulling a sleigh!